Last week Uncle Spud got a letter from Laura Bush. It was a very nice letter, thanking him for being such a good friend to her and the president. She said she valued his friendship and his continued support in helping to fix all of the things wrong with the country. And she said it would be great if he could send another 50 bucks to help out.
I asked Spud if he was going to write a check, seeing how he and the first lady are such good friends and all, and here is what he said:
In 1994 the Republicans promised a contract with America. They said if we elected a Republican majority in congress they would override Bill Clinton's liberal agenda and guide the ship of state from over his shoulder. So we rallied the troops, sent the cavalry to the rescue, and won a Republican majority in both the senate and house. And nothing happened. Bill Clinton went his merry way while all of those new congressmen sat on their hands and watched. Our Republican majority did no good at all.
And then came the 2000 presidential election. Elect a Republican and we'll get this train back on the right tracks we were told. Again, we rallied the troops, fought a good fight, and got Bush elected in a photo finish. And other than a well-deserved war, nothing much happened to fix the country's problems. But wait, we were told. The man can't do much until his second term when he doesn't have to worry about re-election. In his second term he will right the wrongs of creeping socialism.
So we fought long and hard to keep Bush on the throne in 2004. John Kerry's swift boat almost ran us over, but we prevailed in the end. Our reward was that someone opened the floodgates on the border and we were overrun with illegal aliens coming in to take the jobs NAFTA hadn't wiped out yet. For eight years Bush did nothing about it.
There are lots of things in this country that desperately need fixing. But it doesn't seem to matter who is in the White House or the congress. Nothing ever changes. Every election, both parties crow like roosters about all they are going to do to fix things. But once the voting is done, it's back to business as usual. It doesn't matter which party has control of things.
We see televised congressional hearings about stupid baseball players on steroids. Who cares? Social security and Medicare are going broke. Why not hearings on that? And congress is going to give "free stimulus money" to help the economy, but they won't admit they are spending your children's inheritance to bail out the fat cat mortgage lenders. It's free bread and circuses. The Romans did the same thing just before their world caved in.
Our middle class is dying while American corporations get filthy rich by manufacturing goods in foreign sweatshops where they pay slave wages. And our government looks the other way. Our heavy industry has all gone overseas. We couldn't have won World War II with a service industry economy like we have now. Where are we headed?
We depend on oil from the Middle East, the most volatile area of the world, while compromising national security by not becoming energy independent here at home. We buy food and consumer goods from Communist Red China, our long-time sworn enemy, and we act like it's a good deal because we get stuff cheap with only a little anti-freeze in the toothpaste. Our politicians worry more about polar bears and the myth of global warming than the rising scourge of radical Islam, those crazy people sworn to kill us. The Jihads work hard to develop nuclear bombs and chemical weapons while we have endless debates about the legality of pouring water in their noses when we catch the rascals. It's madness.
And then, we don't have much of a choice in this year's election. All three contenders are Democrats, even the Republican. Which shade of liberalism do you prefer?
So, I'm sorry, Laura Bush, but I won't be sending any donations this time. I need to save my money for when my job goes overseas. But then, the way the dollar is loosing value, the value of my savings account is shrinking faster than it gains interest. Maybe I'll just stock up on food and gasoline.