Poor little Hanoi Jane
"I feel so bad for Jane Fonda," Uncle Spud said sadly. "Last week QVC cancelled her scheduled appearance to sell her new book. She's been telling the national news media that she's being unfairly discriminated against because those nasty Vietnam veterans are still holding her accountable for the youthful indiscretions of her past."
"She was 34 when she went to Hanoi," I growled.
"She said QVC received hundreds of complaints and threats of boycotts from angry veterans and their families. To avoid the controversy, QVC caved to the pressure. Now, instead of Jane Fonda and her new book, they're going to have some grinner selling pots and pans. Jane is very upset about that."
"Bummer," I told him. "I hate to see anyone singled out for discrimination, but in this instance I understand it. In my humble opinion, Jane Fonda doesn't deserve to enjoy the fruits of American capitalism. She should be living in isolated obscurity in France or planting rice with her communist friends in Southeast Asia. Her American citizenship should have been revoked in 1972 and she should have been banned from ever entering this country again."
"Man, talk about carrying a grudge," Spud exclaimed. "It's been 40 years. When are you Vietnam guys going to get over it."
"I think having her book promotion cancelled is a small price to pay," I argued. "Had she committed her perfidy fifty or a hundred years earlier, she might have been shot."
"What did she do?" he asked.
"Jane Fonda is the very incarnation of treason," I offered.
"Jane was born a child of wealth and privilege. Her father was the famous movie star Henry Fonda. Jane was a beautiful girl who enjoyed the very finest of everything America had to offer. She was pampered, coddled and spoiled from infancy. She came of age during Vietnam era, and in the early sixties she went feminist hippy. That by itself was not a big deal, but Jane also joined the anti-war movement and became the poster girl of the radical left. We could forgive her, even for that, but Jane made a whole lot of public appearances where she called American soldiers war criminals, baby killers and thugs.
She used a lot of obscenities when describing her country and our soldiers.Of course, those of us who served honorably in Vietnam were offended by her remarks.
"When Jane had fully plowed the field of hate speech and anti-American rhetoric, she sought new ground and decided to do something spectacular to win further accolades from the left. She packed her bags and went to Hanoi. There, she taunted American prisoners of war, calling them criminals, liars and murderers. She made several propaganda broadcasts for the North Vietnamese, publicly thanked the Russians for supplying arms and ammunition to kill American soldiers, and had her picture taken at the controls of an enemy anti-aircraft gun as if she were firing at American airplanes. Her entire trip was an act of treason. Tokyo Rose went to prison after World War II for doing less.
"She came home a hero. Her hate-filled, love and peace spouting friends welcomed her with open arms. She was never tried for aiding and abetting an enemy in time of war. The politicians were afraid of her."
"Didn't she apologize later on?" Spud asked.
"No," I assured him. "In 1988 she met with a veterans group and said she was sorry for having her picture taken on the anti-aircraft gun, but she defended everything else she did in Hanoi, using the excuse that she was trying to end the war. That, of course, was crap. Instead of trying to mediate, she had simply sided with our enemy. And, she wouldn't have met with the veterans then, but they were picketing and disrupting her latest film project and she wanted it to stop.
"Will the vets ever get over it," Spud asked.
"In a way they have," I said. "Today Jane is honored on almost every military base in the country. There are dozens of Jane Fonda memorial latrines, complete with bronze plaques and official signs. No other American has ever been so honored."
"Having a latrine named for you hardly sounds like an honor," Spud said.
"A sincere token of the respect our military still has for her after all these years," I assured him.
"What goes around comes around," Spud smiled.